December 08, 2009

Tiger's "Escalade Escapade": It's Our Fault

All bad behavior can be traced to advertising. If we just eliminated advertising there would be no more screwing, no more smoking, no more drinking, no more fat people, no more skinny people...

According to the San Francisco Chronicle, the reason Tiger Woods couldn't keep Little Eldrick in his pants, is because of us:
"The simplest explanation of Tiger Woods' current predicament had nothing to do with lust, marital betrayal or fallen idols. It described the crafting of an icon and the takeover of sports by corporate advertising."
Right.

Tiger's the victim in this. We're the bad guys. We kidnapped every bimbo in Vegas, gave them all boob jobs,  dangled them naked in front of Tiger and ordered him to "just do it." Our bad.

By the way, the only people not surprised by the Tiger Woods' Escalade Escapade (trade mark pending) are Ad Contras.

We all learned back in October that Everybody Lies About Sex. This is particularly true of other women's husbands.

Give most men unlimited and unimpeded access to bimbos and they'll get in trouble every time. It ain't pretty, but there it is.

The saving grace is that about 1 man in a million has unlimited and unimpeded access to bimbos. That's why all the rest are trying to be Tiger Woods.

And Speaking of Escalades...
...what kind of extravaganza requires 1,200 limos and 140 private jets? That's right, the climate summit. "We're having to drive them (limos) in hundreds of miles from Germany and Sweden," says one limo company owner. And the private jets? "...the planes will have to fly off to regional airports – or to Sweden – to park, returning to Copenhagen to pick up their VIP passengers." If these idiot politicians had set out to undermine their cause and make themselves look like irresponsible hypocrites they couldn't have done a better job.

Probably advertising's fault.

Big Thanks...
...to Ben over at excellent blog If This Is A Blog Then What's Christmas for naming The Ad Contrarian one of the 10 best ad blogs of the decade.

Also, If You're Not Reading...
... Ad Aged and The Grumpy Brit you should be.

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