December 04, 2009

I'm Still Shaking

Last Saturday I was in New York City. I was on the subway, on the "A" train, with my wife. She was exiting at 59th St. and I was continuing uptown.

There was a lunatic in our car belittling people and demanding money. I decided that when my wife exited at 59th, I would exit also and move to the next car. Then I hesitated and chastised myself for being a coward. Finally, I decided to change cars.

As I entered the new car I saw an open seat. I headed for it.

The doors were closing. Suddenly a man jumped up from his seat. He had his 6-year old son by the arm. The boy had a tiny kid-size rolling suitcase in tow.

The man had obviously missed his stop. He blocked the door and jumped out onto the platform. The door continued to close. He still had the boy by the arm.

The kid fell. Most of him fell onto the platform, but his leg fell between the platform and the train. The door was closing.

I saw this in vivid, horrifying slow motion. I ran to the door and held it. I grabbed the boy's leg and pulled it up from the gap. I pushed him onto the platform and threw his rollie out after him. The door closed and the train pulled away. It all happened in a second.

I stood there shaking.

Some people are just too fucking stupid to be parents.

...we award the Turd d'Or -- the 2009 Bully Award for Outstanding Achievement in Advertising and Marketing Bullshit.

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