- Dry mouth
- Nausea
- Sudden and inexplicable death
- Dancing ahead of the beat
- Calling everyone "Billy"
- Fond memories of Paris
- Bunting with men in scoring position
- Asking your dentist for a date
- Hankering for kosher pickles
- Naive faith in golf tips
- Shaving one side only
- Being nice to Frenchmen
- Ability to see magnetic waves
- Putting both socks on one foot
- Compulsion to sign non-compete agreements
- Questioning the rules of hockey
- Vomiting
- Rhyming "prove" with "love"
- Aversion to fondu
- Saluting Chinese people
- Belated birthday wishes from strangers
- Relief pitcher facial hair
- Sex with others
- Overuse of the word "penultimate"
- Sleeping at your dry cleaner's house
- Buying a dinette set
- Cat teasing
- Frequent dizziness when spinning around very fast with your eyes closed
- Wearing silly hats
- Assigning unpleasant names to co-workers
- Tiredness after thinking
- Expecting a package from New Jersey
- Violence directed at those weaker and smaller than you
- Running through fields in slow motion
- Overcooking the beans
- Not being able to get "The Impossible Dream" out of your head
- Bouncing your shoulders while chuckling
- A penchant for quadratic equations
- Moist nostrils
- Not finishing your sentenc
August 26, 2009
Symptoms May Include
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