January 03, 2011

My Top 10 New Year's Resolutions

Here are my New Years resolutions for 2011:
1. I will not slow-dance with Eliot Spitzer
2. I will answer the telephone in French 
3. I will not pick up my dog's poop unless he picks up mine
4. I will take at least 3 showers this year in a suit
5. I will actively work for the deportation of digital natives
6. When they ask for my order at the drive-thru window, I will use my super- funny yodeling voice
7. I will stop trying to pick up girls at the genius bar
8. I will change my online user name to "King Larry the Fourteenth of China" 
9. I will not Join The Conversation
10. I will try to breathe every day

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