December 16, 2013

The Top 10 List Of Top 10 Lists

Tis the season of top 10 lists.

As we get closer to the new year, top 10 lists will thrive like blue fuzzy stuff on last week's cream cheese.

Recently, Emily Nussbaum, TV critic for The New Yorker, wrote a piece about why she hates year-end top 10 lists and how she refuses to write them. Clearly, Emily is out of touch with the prevailing digital-age zeitgeist.

Here at The Ad Contrarian Global Headquarters, one of our core values is to give back to our loyal readers. And if that means top 10 lists, then top 10 lists it is.

Since many of our regular visitors are bloggers, web entrepreneurs, or other underachievers who depend on web traffic to build either their businesses or their egos, we thought we'd help out with some top 10 list ideas you can use this week that are surefire click-magnets.

So here are some titles for "10 thing" posts that are guaranteed to have people flocking to your web site: 
  • 10 Ways To Smoke All The Weed You Want And Still Write Awesome Banner Ads 
  • 10 Super-Hot Nymphos Who Don't Mind Picking Up a Pizza On The Way Over 
  • 10 Jobs Besides Marketing That Pay A Lot Of Money To Dimwits 
  • 10 Internationally Handsome Movie Stars Who Want To Take You To France
  • 10 Things To Put On A Pastrami Sandwich That Make You Lose Weight
  • 10 Reasons Why Women Vacuum While You're Watching Football 
  • 10 Legal Foods That Still Contain Gluten 
  • 101 Contrarian Ideas About Advertising...oops, sorry, that's the title of my book that you should buy everyone for Christmas
  • 10 Guys Named Zander Who Aren't Douchebags
  • 10 Ways To Become Wealthy Sitting On Your Ass Reading Blogs  
Since there are only a few days left in the year, and since I'm way behind in my drinking, and since I look for any excuse not to write, for the remainder of the year I'm going to post my ten favorite Ad Contrarian posts from 2013. I realize it's a little narcissistic to pick your own top 10, but what the hell do you think blogging is about anyway?

Have a great Christmas and a wonderful New Year and remember, it's only advertising.


TCWriter said...

You could seriously find 10 guys named Zander who aren't douchebags?

Bruce Smithhammer said...

Dammit, Tom - you beat me to it.