I'm Not A Whore. I'm A Pimp.

It has occurred to me that I have not pimped my book recently on this blog.

The reason it occurred to me is that I just checked the sales numbers and they're dropping like Tim Tebow at a revival meeting.

So, since there are thousands of you (okay, dozens) who read this thing every day and haven't yet shelled out the meager pennies, I thought I would torment you with quotes from the Amazon reviews until you finally give in and buy the damn thing.

Here we go:

• "This book is an insightful, hilarious look at what's wrong with advertising agencies, with marketing in general, and maybe even the world overall. But it isn't just for people who work in ad agencies. It's for anybody who ever saw an ad that sucked and wondered how it got that way."

• "I loved this book. I am not, thank God, in advertising but this book taught me a lot about how to avoid the BS that comes from working with other people...it's an easy, clever read and it will help you feel OK about tuning out and spacing out at office meetings." We all need that kind of help."

• "This is a great book...I hate advertising...His writing is witty and has a no-nonsense attitude. He reveals that what many ad agencies do is to advertise themselves to sell their services to companies that buy into bizarre concepts of branding and "communicating" with consumers ...This is a great book about advertising for people who don't like advertising."

• "Bob Hoffman's perspective is terrific because he continually digs into various heaping piles of advertising hype to discover nuggets of truth. And if he doesn't find any, he's not afraid to say how bad it stinks."

• "Brilliant stuff, funny as hell...This is take no prisoners kind of stuff that is just superbly written always. Buy it, read it. If you are like me it will make you laugh, make you cry and shake your head in wonder."

• "Bob is one of the smartest guys in the business. His thoughts are not obscured by fads, what's au courant or quotidian bs. He is a straight-shooter. Honest, to the point and fact-based. Qualities sorely missing in the world today."

• "A handbook for smart marketers... Did I mention he is funny as hell?"

• "The world's second best book on advertising!...The book is a classic, a compendium of some of Bob's better posts on his blog. They are all gems..."

• "A must read for advertising professionals... I've been a fan of Bob's blog for a long time. His wit and insight into the business of advertising is spot on."

• "A funny, enlightening, clear-eyed look at advertising and marketing. Pleasantly didactic and cheerfully challenging of the fables and fantasies that pass for advertising principles... Quite possibly the best $2.99 book out there! "

This book -- that all my relatives these brilliant reviewers are talking about -- will actually cost you less to buy than the tax on that crappy tuna sandwich you're gonna have for lunch.

So c'mon. Do a brother a solid here and buy the damn book. I don't make any money on it but I feel bad when the sales drop.