August 01, 2008

Why We Need To Kill Them All

On a number of occasions I've said we need to kill all account planners and start over. Here's why.

Last week they had a big hoo-hah account planning conference in Miami (missed it -- had to wash my hair.)

Ad Age ran a column about the high points. The conclusions from this conference are so mind-numbingly cliche-ridden that they are almost a parody of themselves.

Here are a few choice excerpts along with some comments from Yours Truly:
"People are no longer waiting to hear from us."
When, I'd like to know, were people waiting to hear from us? Was I sick that week? Advertising is a nuisance. Always has been, always will be. That's why we get the big bucks -- to make people pay attention to stuff they're trying frantically to avoid.
"It's a shifting world, and understanding the landscape is more important than ever."
What in the world does this mean? When has the world not been shifting? When have you not had to understand the landscape?
"Understand the conversation, insert your brand into it and then keep going."
You knew it was coming. The fucking "conversation." Will someone PLEASE find a new cliche. The next person I hear say "conversation" is going to die. I'm not kidding
"We must create content that changes the world."
How about creating content that sells some shit. Wanna change the world? Join the fucking U.N.

It took 650 account planners to come up with this bullshit.

If you want to read the whole smelly thing go here.

Apology:
I really don't like using the f-bomb as much as I've been using it lately. I'm going to try to wean myself off it. But not today.

Wean:
It's a funny word.

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