U Is The Dirtiest Letter

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"What is the granola sweetened with?"

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Peyton Manning and Papa John


Gen. David Petraeus
Why is anyone still surprised about the stupid things guys do with their weenies?

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Have you ever wondered why so many of your Christmas gifts are so crappy? According to The Wall Street Journal's MarketWatch, one in six smart phone users buy holiday gifts while in the toilet.

U Is The Dirtiest Letter
It occurred to me recently that u is the dirtiest letter in the English alphabet.

It appears in perhaps 5-10% of all our words, but in a significantly higher percent of our most powerful dirty words:  fu**, su**, cu**, pu***.

Not only does it appear in these words, but it's the only vowel in them.

This seems a highly unlikely coincidence. I think there's just something dirty about that letter.

Picture the word masturbate. I think it would be a lot less naughty with an e instead of a u.

And Speaking Of That
Guy goes to the doctor for a check-up.
Doctor tells him, "You have to stop masturbating."
Guy says, "Really? Why?"
Doctor says, "So I can take your blood pressure."